I once heard someone say that the most relaxed brides before the wedding end up being the most stressed brides on the day of the wedding. Their argument was that those brides hadn’t really finalized a lot of their decisions before the Big Day, so a battery of vendors positing a barrage of questions requiring on the spot answers resulted in a stressed-out bride. On the other extreme, I’ve worked with brides who have planned their events to such detail that they are married to their idea of the wedding day and there isn’t any room for error, spontaneity or for the groom! No photographer or filmmaker can improve a pinched smile and stressed face, so what is a bride to do?
There are 2 things you can do to ensure you enjoy your wedding day. 1. Plan ahead. 2. Don’t worry about what anyone else thinks (your mother included).
Remember that relaxed bride? She was so easy-going she never thought about whether the napkins would go in the glass or on the plate. She didn’t count on boutonnieres for the ring boy and ushers, and now her sister-in-law is looking for them everywhere (they don’t exist). This is the bride whose easy-going attitude is being sabotaged on the very day she needs it most. Deferring all those decisions will rack up a lot of little stresses on the wedding day that will turn your smile into a frown. Plan these details out in advance so you don’t have to worry about them when you’re supposed to be having fun.
Then there’s the bride who has everything planned to the second. Her timeline is biblical, because she’s scheduled everything from bathroom breaks to when the lights are turned down. This bride has become overwrought and overrun by her wedding. Chances are, it’s because a lot of people are telling her that unless she does x, then y and z will be upset, unimpressed, insulted, etc. Now, she is worried about pleasing everyone. Remember that a wedding day is about starting a committed romantic life publicly and employing the support of family and friends in this new union and new chapter. If they are requiring your support on the day you need theirs, people are going to be disappointed. Know that you have taken everyone’s input into consideration and planned an event that will address the needs of as many people as possible. On the day of, enjoy the fruits of your labors and let others worry about the rest.
Through advanced planning and remembering to be pleased by your wedding day and not spend it pleasing others, you can ensure that your big day involves the least amount of stress. And that’s going to look great in your photos and video!